The hair non-inverse law of beanies

Well, it was REALLY cold last night. Even with the trailer's slightly dodgy heating system (heat is considered strictly relatively; the air coming out of the ducts was still in a gaseous phase, at least), I had to sleep with my beanie on. Even my nifty Target polar fleece blankie wasn't up to the task by itself...
This morning I took the beanie off (mistake, it was even colder then), and noticed that my hair had reached a height and volume that challenged Ace Ventura's. How is it that sleeping for 10 hours (give or take) with a snug beanie leaves my hair standing up on end? Surely it should be all stuck down? This leads me to declare a new law of physics:
The 'hair non-inverse law of beanies' states that hair volume will change to an extent proportional to the square of the force * time applied to the hair, but in the opposite direction. This implies that a beanie applying, say, 5 Newtons of elastic force for 10 hours will leave the hair standing up on end, quivering with an equivalent force of 250 N in an upward and sideways direction. People have even been known to levitate after prolonged sleeping in very tight beanies. Of course, if it's that cold, the foot inverse law of socks will probably ensure a counterbalancing downward force.